Category Archives: The Envy Of All Babies: Jack

World Cup, You Suck

Here are 4 simple changes that will make soccer into a real sport.

Free Puppies!

The boys and I were gleeful when we made the signs.

Infinity & Beyond!

“Daddy how many stars do you have?” Jack asked. “3,” I replied. “I have 9 zillion thousand infinity and beyonds!” Charlie rode his scooter next to Jack’s big wheel.  “And I have ten thousand!”  His eyes opened really wide like I had never heard a number that big. We were racing in circles around the cul-de-sac […]

On The Grid

I installed a Personal Weather Station on my back deck yesterday.  It is awesome. Loyal fans of Herbietown can now read my blog, read about my wedding, buy me presents, AND, AT LONG LAST, check the weather at my house.  Just what you always wanted. Here’s a shot of the PWS bolted onto my back deck. […]

I Love You Infinity

He asked me why I tell him “I love you infinity” so much.  I explained that I didn’t want him to forget it.  He said he wouldn’t. Then he asked why I always tell him that I love him “no matter what.” “Because I don’t want you to forget.” “Even if I hit Charlie?” “Yes, […]

What Doesn’t Belong In This Picture?

Man, I’m going to miss this place. We got something like 18 inches, and in some parts it drifted to 3 feet.  Beautiful morning.  The wind is blowing and swirling but it’s not biting cold.  We got absolutely dumped on. The air smells of crackling wood from our wood stove. We’re watching Nemo coverage on […]


We played in the snow yesterday.  I didn’t have the heart to tell the boys that it doesn’t snow in Atlanta.  They are going to be devastated. We only got about an inch, but it’s the perfect amount for a game we played.  The game is simple.  It’s called “Look at these footprints.”  Or maybe […]


We had 2 showings yesterday.  We usually go to Little Pub when we have showings; it’s the best restaurant ever and very kid-friendly.  But yesterday the showings were at 11 and 3, so not the ideal times for Little Pub (it doesn’t open until 11:30).  We went to Orem’s instead and got waffles and grilled […]

Is My Beard My Mid-Life Crisis?

Is my beard my mid-life crisis?  Is this it? Or at least how it starts?  Like now that I’ve taken step one, I can just go off the handle, buy a chainsaw motorcycle, and start smoking joints that I buy from some teenage neighbor? Pre and post beard.  You can easily see the difference.

“Hello, World” – Samuel Ernest Herbert

He came 6 hours before the scheduled C-section.  My wife went into labor around midnight, so we got in the car and ran every traffic light between Wilton and Stamford Hospital. I pulled the car up at the maternity ward’s front entrance and just left it there with the keys in it.  We rushed inside […]

Should Women Raise Kids or Work?

All this talk about Marissa Mayer becoming the first pregnant CEO of a Fortune 500 company….it got me thinking. I’m excited for new barriers to be broken down, no doubt, but the coverage made me think I was in a time warp. Aren’t we past this, people? Can we focus on the issue at hand […]

“Daddy, Daddy, I Had a Bad Dream!”

“Daddy, Daddy, I had a bad dream. I had a bad dream!” I opened my eyes. 4:19 AM. My wife shook me. “I got it, I got it. I’ll check on him.” I stumbled down the dark hallway and into his room. He was sitting up in bed, crying, clutching his blanket. “I had a […]

Inappropriate Thoughts at Tee Ball

Jack had his first tee ball practice on Saturday. It was 40 degrees out. He wouldn’t take his baseball glove off all morning. He was excited to play baseball.

I didn’t know what to wear.

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Too Many TV’s at The Gym

I go to the gym to feel good. The goal is to get blood pumping through my body, to get my muscles moving, and to turn off my mind. I would prefer to run outside, in the forest, surrounded by chipmunks and butterflies. But it’s pitch black at 5am, and the forest doesn’t have a […]

Dinosaur Sex

I guess the kids have to learn somehow. I was in the middle of a meeting when I received a text from my wife.  It said, simply “Diplodocus Sex” and included this picture. I love getting texts like this during the day.  It reminds me that the important things in life are going to be […]

Hey Daddy, What’s Business?

“What are you doing Daddy?” “I’m making a presentation, Jack.” “What’s a presentation?” “Well, a presentation is a document used to convince people to do something.” “What’s a presentation?” “It’s a way for grown-ups to tell a story about business.” “What’s business?” “It’s a word that people use to talk about how they get things […]